Top 10 things You Can't Do In America
In Europe, the culture is different, and there are many things you can do here that you would get into trouble (of some sort) if you did these things in America. Just for fun, these all happened to me. Here we go:
10 -- Go to a McDonalds and ask for a number #4 and get (and pay for) FOUR sandwiches, FOUR drinks, and FOUR fries.
9 -- Take two photos of tourists in a park and demand $8 for them, or else you won't return the camera back.
8 -- Walk through a busy highway without looking, expecting everyone to weave around you, without getting mad at all.
7 -- Stop and have a conversation with someone in the middle of a busy highway and have everyone weave around you and no one get mad at you.
6 -- In a packed subway car, bump and push your way through people to make an exit.
5 -- In a packed subway car, bump and push your way through people to make an exit, and not wear any deodorant.
4 -- Don't wear deodorant at all, anywhere you go.
3 -- Stop in the middle of any intersection, busy hallway, exit, terminal, or any place with a bottleneck of pedestrian traffic and just start talking to other people, totally oblivious to anyone else around you.
2 -- Creating a ticket line and have tourists start queuing up. Then, have only ONE ticket man selling tickets and allow five thousand people go through 1.5 hours of shoving, knocking others over and (potentially) trampling on children. Not to mention the ordeal of deodorant absence.
And the number one thing you can't do in America (or anywhere else civilized) but you can do in Europe is:
1 -- Get together with a group of friends at the bottom of a down-escalator. Start chatting and ignore dozens of other people continually trying to exit the escalator without being shredded.
In America, these are called (in order): extortion, extortion, suicide, suicide with bells on it, a good way to start a fight, a really good way to start a fight, a way not to impress women, inconsiderate and rude, a lawsuit waiting to happen, a multiple homicide waiting to happen.
10 -- Go to a McDonalds and ask for a number #4 and get (and pay for) FOUR sandwiches, FOUR drinks, and FOUR fries.
9 -- Take two photos of tourists in a park and demand $8 for them, or else you won't return the camera back.
8 -- Walk through a busy highway without looking, expecting everyone to weave around you, without getting mad at all.
7 -- Stop and have a conversation with someone in the middle of a busy highway and have everyone weave around you and no one get mad at you.
6 -- In a packed subway car, bump and push your way through people to make an exit.
5 -- In a packed subway car, bump and push your way through people to make an exit, and not wear any deodorant.
4 -- Don't wear deodorant at all, anywhere you go.
3 -- Stop in the middle of any intersection, busy hallway, exit, terminal, or any place with a bottleneck of pedestrian traffic and just start talking to other people, totally oblivious to anyone else around you.
2 -- Creating a ticket line and have tourists start queuing up. Then, have only ONE ticket man selling tickets and allow five thousand people go through 1.5 hours of shoving, knocking others over and (potentially) trampling on children. Not to mention the ordeal of deodorant absence.
And the number one thing you can't do in America (or anywhere else civilized) but you can do in Europe is:
1 -- Get together with a group of friends at the bottom of a down-escalator. Start chatting and ignore dozens of other people continually trying to exit the escalator without being shredded.
In America, these are called (in order): extortion, extortion, suicide, suicide with bells on it, a good way to start a fight, a really good way to start a fight, a way not to impress women, inconsiderate and rude, a lawsuit waiting to happen, a multiple homicide waiting to happen.
posted by Michael Czajkowski @ 12:59 PM
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